How Intuitive Eating Changed Haley's Life

When I begin to work with clients around intuitive eating, I know something they don’t fully know yet…

It’s about so much more than eating.

I want to share a client’s story with you.

No, actually, we both want to share her story with you.

Haley’s story shows just how powerful and life changing intuitive eating can be.

At the time of this writing, Haley was only 6 weeks into my private coaching program, and yet you’d think we had been working together for years.

When I first met Haley, she reminded me of my younger self.

She told me how she felt compelled to work out 2-3x a day. She’d stress all day about how to get her workouts in.

Her Apple watch taunted her to burn more calories, so that became her priority: burn more calories.

She told me how she wished she could eat things like pizza, but she couldn’t because it wasn’t healthy. She had to stick to her salads and chicken and veggies and hummus and smoothies…

She told me how she wished she could just go out to dinner with her friends, but was always stressed out if there would be anything healthy enough for her to eat on the menu.

She described how constantly distracted she was by food and exercise thoughts.

Little-by-little, Haley and I began her intuitive eating, body positive journey based in the transformational coaching method.

In just six weeks, I was with Haley as she celebrated her first week without running (something she realized she truly hated and dreaded, yet felt addicted to) and as she enjoyed her first cheeseburger in 9 years, a food she had fond memories of from birthday parties growing up, but wouldn’t allow herself to eat.

Haley sat across from me, glowing as the food was set in front of us on the table. She was so happy we had to capture the moment, so we took this picture.

 The joy and freedom she is feeling in this photo is something you can only understand if you, too, have come from a place of strict food rules and restriction.

When for 9 years, you don’t allow yourself to eat a burger due to fear… being able to order one, without guilt and enjoy one, without guilt, without exercise penance or skipping meals… is a very big deal.

In fact, Haley sat across from me, enjoying each and every bite, and told me how she cancelled the cycle class she had planned for that night because she knew she wanted to go to yoga instead (something she never would have done previously: not enough calories burned).

In fact, yoga is something Haley said she never would have done before. She always ran or did other high intensity workouts. But yoga? That as not on her radar.

Now, Haley allows herself to move in ways she actually enjoys, which includes cycling and a whole lot of yoga. She also allows her body to rest. Something she never used to be able to do.

It Haley hard this week, how intuitive eating really is so much more than just about food and exercise.

She had just taken the MCAT and submitted applications to medical school this past month: something she had worked so hard for and planned on for a long time.

When she got her test score back: they weren’t what she had hoped for.

This could have sent her into a tizzy. In fact, it would have sent the old Haley into a tizzy.

But the new Haley saw her life from new eyes.

She realized how tightly she was trying to control every area of her life: from food to exercise to her career… and just as she felt liberation in finding food freedom… this quickly translated into the rest of her life.

She sat across the table from me telling me how she was ready to trust what the Universe had in store for her.

Haley wrote about what she now is calling, “The Best Week of Her Life.” Here’s what she had to say:

“This last week, I noticed how many thoughts I had that were against what me and my body wanted. I’ve realized there are no literal laws written about what food is good or bad, how much one should exercise or what one should do to exercise, or what career path makes someone successful. I realized the feelings of freedom, relief, and happiness is what made me, and my life, feel like a million bucks. Not the workout I did, not what I ate that day, and not what my career path was going to be. Instead all those things brought me stress an anxiety even though my mind has tried to teach me that those are what bring happiness.

I realized how I was never fully satisfied because I was always worried about the next step and how I would attain it perfectly, instead of just enjoying the journey of life and being happy with the path I am naturally meant to be on.

So, this week I tried something new. I tried taking a deep breath, taking a step back and literally asking myself throughout the day, all day what I genuinely wanted in the moment. What would really make me happy? I noticed how many times what was going to make me happy was different than what my mind was telling me made me happy. I told myself this one week, I needed to try to listen to purely my body. Just give it a try for one week and then I can go back to being controlling if I felt the need.

The second I told myself this on Saturday after being so upset about my MCAT score, I felt the BIGGEST sigh of relief. There are no words that can describe how free, relieved, and HAPPY I felt right in that moment.

I just felt un-stuck. I felt free to do activities and things that make me happy and ditch what doesn’t. I felt free to realize there are so many careers that involve medicine and there is one out there that is meant perfectly for me. I felt free letting my body tell me what to do, NOT my mind.

It’s crazy how much I got to experience in this beautiful world in just one week. How much I was holding myself back from.

I need to stop being so tense, stressed, and high strung. I need to go with the flow and enjoy each and every moment without worrying about what’s to come next. Taking this mentality gave me the most freeing week of my life.

Each moment of each day I would ask myself what I really want. Do I want to work out? If so, what do I want to do. Am I hungry? If so what exactly is my body craving? Do I want to force myself to do something for medical school that makes me stressed and miserable? If not, what do I feel like doing with my time instead that makes me feel satisfied? And let me tell you, I thought for sure I would want to go back to being controlling, but after the immense freedom and relief I felt, I want to live with this mindset and lifestyle forever. I have such a great desire to continue to re-wire my brain to now agree with my body instead of having a mind of its own.

I did things this week I NEVER in a million years thought I would get to do in my life for no other reason than my mind would always tell me not to.

This week I decided to look at the many career paths involving medicine and realized there are so many that encompass a way for me to reach my goals in a fashion that is best suited for me and my happiness. Ones that don’t require me to force myself to do things that make me miserable. I also had the best and most satisfying meal of my life. A burger and fries. Holy cow it was incredible.

The freer I feel to satisfy what I am craving in the moment (food, exercise, social life) the happier my life will be. When I think about it, it sounds so silly to do things for an ideal path or image. Why am I trying to satisfy others or satisfy what the culture defines as successful instead of satisfying myself and satisfying my own definition of happiness?

We are all different which means it’s impossible to have one ideal successful career path or body image or exercise routine or food diet. If I am satisfying others’ lives, then I don’t get to enjoy it because I am not living their life I am living my own.”

Intuitive eating is about so much more than eating.

And that is why I coach.

Fitness Instructors: Do No Harm.

Fitness Instructors: Do No Harm.

I was talking to a client about her relationship with food and exercise.

She came back to me for our next session and said, "damn, Julie, I didn't realize how many food/body/exercise shaming messages I get every single day, especially at the gym."

She's right.

Food and body shaming is everywhere... and, honestly? A lot of it comes from a well-intended place. For instance, if you're a fitness instructor, you likely have a mission to empower people to be healthy and strong. That is SUCH a positive intention! Thank you for that! However... if we aren't aware of how our language impacts our class-goers (both in class and on social media) we can be doing much more harm than good. We may be causing people to feel ashamed about their food choices, see exercise as a punishment, and see their bodies as "needing fixed." 

And what does this do? It drives disordered eating and exercise behaviors (or full on eating disorders), body shame, and lots of negative self-talk, body bashing and ultimately lowered self-esteem.

This is a topic I was passionate about from the early days of my fitness career due to my own disordered relationship with my own body. I began teaching boot camp style classes in 2011, from there I got my personal training certification, cycling, and most recently yoga.

I studied this very topic in graduate school: how the language we use in the fitness room impacts things like self-esteem and body image.

I'm writing this post because we have a responsibility to do no harm to our class-goers. We would never want to hurt them physically, and we go LENGTHS to avoid physical injury, however... when it comes to mental and emotional health, we are hurting people every day.

So let's look at our language here, and see how we can empower, rather than shame our class participants. Here are a few rules of thumb:

1. Please, don't use food as a motivator to exercise, or honestly even mention food at all. For instance, saying things about needing to work off the weekend, that burger, the donut, Thanksgiving, Christmas cookies...

When you say this, it subconsciously tells people that they are bad for what they did this weekend/ate, and it shifts the workout from being something positive they are doing for themselves, to something negative: a punishment for "being bad." 

This is a form of food shaming. If you've never experienced a disordered relationship to your body, you probably wouldn't think twice about saying this, you may even just think it's funny. But for anyone in your class who has struggled (and honestly, most do) it reaffirms to them that they should feel ashamed and guilty for their food choices. 

Many people are already very hard on themselves for what they eat already, so when someone in a leadership position (a fitness instructor) says out loud that, yes, they should work off that burger, their inner critic is reinforced and they go deeper into their self-destructive hole: burger, BAD, salad, GOOD. 

When people think they "were bad" for eating certain foods, it encourages a disordered relationship with food, where people attach their morality with their food choices. It keeps them at war with food and their bodies. Likely it will lead to food and body obsession, and a cycle of unhealthy yo-yo dieting.

 2. Avoid motivation using "beach body" language or any other sort of language that turns our bodies into objects to mold and fix.

When we tell people they should work out to look a certain way (or to get ready for the beach), we are objectifying their bodies. We are reaffirming that yes, our society's thin ideal is something we should strive for, that there is a "right" way to look, and that we should want to look that way. It also, therefore, tells us that if we do not have that certain body, that we are not healthy/strong/beautiful. We are telling them that they need to look a certain way to wear a swim suit.

For most people, the thin ideal is physically impossible, so all this language is doing is keeping people obsessed with an unattainable ideal.

Furthermore, we are telling people that ultimately, they are objects, their bodies are objects, and thus, all the amazing things about them who make them truly special don't matter as much if they don't LOOK a certain way. 

We are once again shifting the workout from a positive thing to do for health and feeling good to a negative intention: working out to "fix" your body that apparently is not "good enough" as it is already. The workout again becomes a punishment. 

3. Encourage people to workout to EARN the cookie (or any other food).

This is similar to telling someone to work "off" the food they ate. Telling someone they need to earn their food tells them that they don't deserve to eat unless they exercise enough.

Again, if someone has a harmful relationship with food and exercise, if anyone has ever had an eating disorder, you are then just reinforcing the fact that they do not deserve to eat unless they "earn it."

4. "No pain, no gain."

I'll often hear instructors encouraging participants to push past the pain. This is dangerous. Yes, it is good to motivate people to work hard, and yes, getting uncomfortable is ok, but pain has no place in any class.

So what can you do?

1. Focus on the mind-body connection.

You don't have to be in a yoga class to focus on a mind-body connection. Focusing on this connection is hugely beneficial for all class participants. Most people run around their days rushed and thinking about all the things on their to-do list. When we provide time in class for people to check in with themselves, we are empowering them to pay attention to themselves in a whole new way. For all we know, this might be the only time all day when someone asks them to check in with THEMSELVES, to ask themselves what they need. That is powerful!

2. Focus on FEELING good.

Instead of motivating class participants to look good, focus on motivating them to feel good. Ask them to notice how they feel, mentally, physically and emotionally. Then, ask them what they need to do to FEEL GOOD walking out the door. For instance, is there anything in them (stress, frustration) that they want to let out during the class? Do they have good energy they want to harness and share? Or is there a goal they have, something they want to do in class that day? This empowers your class participants to ask themselves what they need on that given day. Sometimes, they might need an emotional release, while other times they might have a physical goal in mind. Allow THEM to decide.

3. Use the power of intention.

At the beginning of class, empower your students to create their own intention. Ask them to focus in on why they're here, what this class gives to them, empowers them to do. Ask them to see their goal, their purpose, the reason for their work out. Encourage them to connect to that intention throughout the workout. When they're needing extra motivation, bring them back to their purpose. "Why are you here?"

*Extra points here if you remind them that calories don't matter, that we are more than our calories in, calories out!

4. Focus on the POSITIVE.

Throughout the class, focus on building positive thoughts, like "YES WE CAN." Sometimes people need that simple reminder that they got this! Other reminders like, "you're stronger than you realize," allow them to feel encouraged that you see their strength, you believe in them... it helps them believe in themselves, it helps them realize their own strength. I've had plenty of people tell me that this message empowers them outside the fitness room, it empowers them to realize that in work, at school, at home, they are stronger than they think, and when life gets tough, this message is gives them the extra strength they need.

5. Use the Adult Tantrum.

In some classes, I'll dedicate a certain song to LETTING SH*T OUT. I'll give my students an outlet to let out their anger. We all have things that piss us off, so this is an opportunity to PHYSICALLY LET IT GO.

After class, a participant came up to me and thanked me for that opportunity, she said, "toddlers are able to have tantrums when they're mad or stressed, they stomp their feet, punch pillows, scream and shout and cry. But as adults, we don't get to do that... but in class we did, you gave us a way to physically let out our stress. It felt SO GOOD."


In yoga, I was taught to always start class by giving a "permission statement." A statement where you give people permission to listen to their bodies. It may sound silly if you always listen to your body, but many people (I used to do this) go to class, and feel the need to do everything the instructor says, even if it doesn't feel good in their body. They feel like if they don't do what the instructor is saying, they're "failing." 

This "permission statement" is so important because you, as the instructor, the leader, give the students permission to listen to their bodies, which is the most important thing of all, and to feel encouraged to leave out anything you say that doesn't feel good in their bodies.

Here is how my permission statement sounds in the yoga room:

"As always, you guys, this is your time. I have a plan for class and will move you through sequences. But please, feel not only empowered but ENCOURAGED to listen to your body. If something doesn't feel good, don't do it. If you're craving something extra, add it. Make this practice uniquely your own and don't worry what anyone else is doing around you." 

*I'll often reinforce this through class by saying, "I love the choices I'm seeing!"

Here is how my permission statement sounds in my cycle class:

"You guys, only YOU know how you feel in your body. I have no idea! So, if anything I tell you to do doesn't feel good, please feel free to opt out! Just don't do it!"

7. The Ultimate Reminder.

I love reminding my students that we are SO LUCKY to have our health and strength and ability to be moving our bodies in this way. We so often take it for granted! I'll use a motivator like, let's push simply because WE CAN. Let's celebrate the fact that our bodies can move!

*I did this last week and had a rider come up to me and thank me. She told me that her mom had passed away a year ago from ALS (a disease that takes away your ability to move your body). She said it really hit her hard, that she is so lucky to move her body, that it's not about the love handles or what she ate, it's about celebrating her ability to move.


Ultimately, as a fitness instructor, you have an amazing opportunity to inspire and empower people every day to live a long, healthy life in and out of class. That is incredible. So let's take this job seriously. Let's start a revolution and build a fitness industry that actually CARES about the mental and emotional well-being of our class participants. It is not just a good thing to do, it's a responsibility we have to support the holistic well-being of all people.

So what do you say: will you be a part of the solution? 



Alright Ladies, Now Let's Get in Formation.

In my body image studies, it has become so easy to see just how demeaning the dieting industry is to women. 

Our wonderful $60 billion diet industry makes its money off of us feeling like we need fixed. They profit from us believing the lie (that we're fed from a YOUNG, young age from multiple sources) that our weight/size/appearance is our most important quality, and if we don't fit a certain mold we aren't worthy, successful, capable of finding love, being happy, and the list goes on.

It's an industry that tells us that our bodies and our looks are more important than our intelligence, our creativity, our compassion, our strength, our humor... like sure, you can be intelligent, says Diet Culture, but are you thin?

I just scoffed even typing that. I mean... RIGHT!? It's insane!

That has always angered me. And when I find myself having negative self-talk creep in, I come back to my proud feminist self, and I think about Diet Culture's suppression and fight that inner critic back, hard. 

But... I just finished reading an incredible book (it's my book club's next read...!)  called "Body Positive Power" by Megan Jayne Crabbe, you also may know her has the fabulous @BodiPosiPanda on instagram.

And she blew my mind when she took this idea a step further. And I just had to share it with you.

"If we think about our own experience, it's easy to see how striving for the ideal body changes us far beyond the physical. It prescribes to us how we should spend our time, our money and our energy. It becomes the thing we focus on the most, the thing we talk about the most, the thing we want most in the world. It becomes a core part of our identity, which is why the thought of giving it up is so terrifying -- what will we be without it? The answer, of course, is whatever the hell we want to be. Female beauty ideals have been used to limit us, who we can become and how much space we're allowed to take up in the world. They are so much more than about what we look like.

... In her 1991 work, The Beauty Myth, Naomi Wolf charts the rise in women's social, economic, and political power with the increasing pressure of the rules of beauty, showing how connected the two are. In other words, the extreme thinness that became the ideal body type at the time isn't accidental, it's an effective method of keeping women hungry, preoccupied, and without enough energy to fight for real equality. On the surface it's about looks, but underneath it's about controlling what a woman can be. As Wolf famously writes, 'a cultural fixation on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty but an obsession about female obedience.'"

Do me a favor. Go back and read that again. And again. And then go journal about your thoughts. Or call your girlfriend and vent to her about how insane that is.

Then, do something about it. Decide that you no longer want to be a part of this Diet Culture that systematically profits (in SO many ways) from suppressing us.

Promise me when I say, it's really not about losing those last 10 pounds. That won't bring you happiness. It's learning how to appreciate what you have right now. It's about retraining your brain to overcome Diet Culture. It's about fighting back and saying NO MORE to this devastatingly damaging culture we live in.

I'm here to help. In fact, my virtual Powerfully Imperfect Program is designed to do this exact thing: challenge the cultural ideal. Empower you to love and appreciate your body and yourself from the inside-out. As Megan says in her book, this isn't about changing the ideal. It's about abolishing the ideal so that we can appreciate and respect ALL bodies.

There are only a few spots left in my 28-day Powerfully Imperfect Program, so snag yours below, I can't wait for you to be a part of this empowering community.

This Is Me. Own Yourself. Embrace Your Body.


You guys. Next week is May. MAY! As our beloved Justin Timberlake sang, IT'S GONNA BE MAY!

I think we're all pretty excited about the weather warming up, right?! My pool is about to open, and I can't WAIT for my favorite form of self-care (podcasting/reading by the pool) to come back into my life.

Unfortunately, it's also this wonderful time of year, that we get inundated with messages about needing to tone up for the summer, needing to look a certain way to go to the beach or the pool...

I know for me in years past, this time of year was filled with anxiety from trying to lose weight in order to be worthy enough to put on a swim suit.

Yeah. I bought into these messages, hard. My body wasn't good enough. I need to cover my stomach. I can't wear shorts because I have cellulite.

These messages kept me hating my body. They kept me deep in my disordered relationship with my self, food and exercise.

As ya'll know by now, I've grown a lot since then. And now consider myself an advocate for body diversity. A Body Positive Warrior, if you will. I now love my body, belly fat and cellulite and ALL.

I know, and if you read my e-mails weekly, or if you read my article on Harness Magazine this week, you know too, that our weight does not define our health. Our weight does not define our worth. It's little more than a biological predisposition. That's it. And yet we're told we need to fix ourselves for having fat.

Well, to kick off this summer season, I'm super stoked to be co-hosting an event that give me ALL THE FEELS.

It's an event I've had in my mind for a long time, and it's finally happening.

This is an event about owning yourself and embracing your body. This is an event about being seen and heard. This is an event to step into a place of empowerment where you can feel PROUD who you are, and what you look like. This is an event that will not only empower you, but will empower everyone else around you, too. This is an event that will change the way you think about and relate to your body. This is an event to step up and say NO MORE to the diet culture/pop culture messages that keep us down. This is an event to say NO MORE to the idea that our weight and our bodies define our worth.

Along with a fellow health at every size/body positive health coach, Amanda Crichton and my wonderfully talented photographer friend, Autumn Theodore and in collaboration with the amazing Lit Life + Yoga, I present to you:

This Is Me. Own Yourself. Embrace Your Body.

Join us for a night of body love. Come bare it all in your sports bras as we have fun with a photo shoot, vinyasa flow, guided meditation, journaling, and an empowering group activity to help you own your self and your body like you never have before.

This is an evening of female empowerment, where we'll not only embrace our own bodies, but see the beauty of all shapes and sizes.

Wait wait wait. Did you read "sports bra" and kind of have a heart attack because ya don't have a six pack? Good news! That's the point! Neither do I. Neither does Amanda or Autumn! And we want to let you in on a little scary as it may be to wear just your sports bra to class, it also happens to be insanely empowering not only for you, but for everyone around you, too...

The price is $25. Not only does that get you a night of connection, yoga and empowerment - but you'll also walk away with two professional photos of Y-O-U taken by Autumn Theodore herself!

Space is limited. We're announcing the event tonight at 5pm. So if this is something you want, just say yes now! I can't wait to see you there. Get your tickets here!

The ONE Thing I Want for My Birthday...

Today's My Birthday. I Just Want ONE Thing...

I've been fired up lately, you guys. 

Fired up because I'm sick and tired of living in a society where beauty is tied to my size.

I'm fed up that my whole life, I've been fed messages from the media that I need to trim my belly fat and be skinny in order to be beautiful.

I'm fed up that the diet industry is a 66 BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY. So when I buy into their messages that my body isn't good enough, that I need to lose weight to be valued, they keep winning.

And even worse? These advertised diets actually wreak havoc on our mental, emotional AND physical health. It's the most brilliant scheme! They tell us to go on a diet, know the diet will fail, and thus we will feel like failures, and thus fall off the band wagon, and then go searching for our next diet... they keep winning (making loads of money). 


I'm over being told that my size matters. I'm over being told I should work for the #bikinibody. I'm over being told that my thighs should be cellulite free.

I'm over being told I may be successful in every other area of my life, but God forbid I don't look a certain way... I AM A FAILURE.

I'm over being told what I need to be or do to be beautiful. 

I'm over being boiled down to MY BODY.

I am more than my body.

And my body is also a freaking miracle, thank you very much.

I want to live in a world where we see beauty in every woman, no matter her size. That there is no stigma around bigger bodies. Where every woman knows she can have a larger body AND be healthy and beautiful. 

And guess what? I get to decide that THAT is my world. That I get to see the world that way. I get to look around and appreciate beauty in all it's different shapes and sizes. And, I get to decide that if someone judges me for the way I look, that's on them. That judgment means WAY more about them, than it does about me. 

I read a post the other day that said, "weight stigma becomes very clear when we recognize that as a society, we are more comfortable with people being thin and unhealthy, than fat and healthy."

Damn, right?

So what do I want for my birthday? I want you to join me in this world where body diversity is CELEBRATED and appreciated! And to take one little step in that direction, I want to fill your social media feed with empowering women in bodies of all shapes and sizes.

It may sound like a small thing, but seeing healthy, confident, proud, STUNNING women in ALL different body shapes ad sizes is so empowering and helps to retrain our brain to see that beauty and health look different on everyone. 

Like flowers! Flowers all look different: various sizes, shapes, colors, heights... and yet they're all beautiful. 

I want to live in a world where we can all appreciate each other's beauty without questioning our own.

So below, I've listed (just a few, I have so many!) of my favorite body positive/badass/boss lady women to follow on instagram. They're all different shapes and sizes. And they're all beautiful, incredible women. Give them a follow and start to see beauty in all forms, not only in others, but most importantly: in yourself.

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The Subtle Art of Listening To YO BODY.

"I'm on a break!"

I was talking to a client this week when she had a major breakthrough. 

We are about 5 weeks in to her 90-Day journey and have been working on breaking up with dieting rules so that she can get to know her own inner food-expert through intuitive eating and find food freedom.

Things have been clicking so much with eating intuitively, that she started to notice a shift when she thought about her exercise routine.

She had started going to a Barre class about a year ago, and had been going weekly ever sense. 

She told me about her year-ago-self, the version of her that began Barre as a way to get into exercise, to GET FIT!

At the beginning, she was so excited because she felt like she found the perfect workout for her... but then things started to change. 

As we talked, she realized slash confessed... she didn't actually enjoy class. In fact, she dreaded it. She told me there was a lot of negative self-talk that surrounded her exercise routine. It came from a place of, "you should do this."

But the fear was: if I stop going to this class, will I fall off the exercise band wagon forever?

I asked her what she thought about finding movement she actually enjoyed. As in, really wanted to do! What if she just took a "break" from barre and "dated" other types of movement until she found one that felt good to her...

She loved this idea...

... and that's when it hit her. 

She told me she didn't realize the 90-Day Program would change her mindset so much, but it has. She realized her intuitive eating journey was spilling into her exercise journey... and now, she wanted to start to move intuitively, too!

Epiphany: "there are somethings we have to do," she said. "Like taxes! You have to pay your taxes, you just do! But you don't have to do exercise classes that you don't like!" And then she realized, she wanted to spend as much of her time doing things she wanted to do versus had to do (like, you know, taxes...).

She realized that she wanted her exercise routine to fall into the "want to do" category, because let's be real, if you don't have to do something you don't like... then don't!

Boom: breakthrough.

By the end of the call, she was feeling fired up and ready to call up her studio and declare like Ross to Rachel, that she too, is on a break from Barre. 

Listening to our body is a powerful thing, as are our intentions that fuel our exercise.

Next time you're thinking about going to exercise, ask yourself, "am I going because I want to? Or because I think I should? Because I think I have to?"

If the answer is in the "should/have to" category... maybe you just need a break, a rest day... or maybe, you too need to declare a BREAK and go date other forms of movement. I promise, there is a form of movement that you will enjoy.

*NOTE: I have absolutely nothing against Barre classes, haha, I have many clients who LOVE Barre classes, and it is the form of movement they really enjoy! There is a form of movement for everyone.

The Heart of My Powerfully Imperfect Program

I went live on Insta last week to talk about the origin of my Powerfully Imperfect Program. This program is so close to my heart, like private coaching, it feels like my whole life has led up to it. So I wanted to share some of that background with you. So you can get a glimpse into the heart of the program. 

I have a distinct memory of sitting in my family room, home alone on a summer day, secretly watching an infomercial on these Pilates DVDs.
I saw beautiful celebrities boasting about how Pilates changed their bodies. The camera would zoom up on this perfectly chiseled belly, a cellulite-free butt, and of course, thin, toned legs.
I remember thinking I need this. I need this to be beautiful. I need this to be loved. To be worthy.
So what did I do? I schemed to get it for my mom for her birthday, “she’d love this pilates DVD set!”
But obviously: I was getting it for me.
I was 12.
I remember shopping for swim suits with one of my friends. Her mom made a comment about her wanting a two piece, “Really? You want people to see your stomach?”
Noted: belly fat is bad.
While I was a normal size growing up, I hit puberty EARLY. Enter: boobs, hips, butt, extra body fat before anyone else. Not only were the fifth and sixth grade boys ruthless (which taught me: people are looking at my body and having opinions about it, and and making comments about it...) but I also started to see myself as bigger than the other girls... and because of the thin ideal culture which praised the twig-skinny Olsen Twins, Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie... I looked at my growing body and thought I was “too big.”
Other girls around me were praised as being “so tiny!” I looked at myself and was like, “welp, certainly not tiny.” 
I devoured Teen People and Women’s Health Magazine. I read them like the bible. They all told me I needed to fix my belly fat, I needed to tone my legs and arms. I was desperately looking for that secret move that really would blast my belly fat, fast. God forbid I have belly fat, nobody will ever love me.
Not to mention the models on the cover were always super (photoshopped) skinny and happy, living the life of their dreams. So obviously, I needed to be skinny to be happy.
I prayed that one day there would be a pill I could take, because nothing else seemed to work.
I was the youngest kid at our rec center doing step aerobics classes and boot camp classes. By far. 
When I got to college, things got worse.
Speaking of college, here’s a memory that is INSANE. Ready for it?
I got into Boston College in December of 2008. If ya don’t know, BC is very expensive. It was also my dream school that I worked my butt off to get into.
I remember not knowing if we could afford it due to the economic crash. I was looking at every possibility, including ROTC scholarships.
*Note: if you know me, you know I don’t even so much as want to HOLD a gun in my life. I never, ever want to hurt someone with a bullet, even if I’m defending myself. I just don’t. I have NO desire. Not trying to make a political statement, I just have no want to hold a gun. Ever. So the fact that I considered ROTC is LAUGHABLE.
But you know what I thought? I thought about the boot camps and figured, “bright side, I’ll be super fit and skinny…”
Things got worse in college. I went abroad to Italy the summer after my freshman year, gained some weight, and came home with a mission to lose it all before the semester began. Enter: most restrictive diet of my life... and sticking my finger down my throat when I "messed up."

I lost weight. And I got LOTS of compliments. What did this tell me? It taught me that I must need to be this skinny in order to get compliments and for people to have desirable opinions about my body and me.

And what did this do? It fueled my disordered relationship with food, exercise and myself. More restricting, over exercising, binging and purging.

I was a MASTER at hiding my growing disordered thoughts and behaviors. Nobody knew.
Until one day they did.
Until one day my sister and best friend found me upstairs after vomiting during a family party.
I’ll never forget it. The dark hallways, them looking at me like… why are you up here… again.
I was so ashamed.
That was also my turning point. When I knew I had to do something about my relationship with my body.

This past week was National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. And while I was never clinically diagnosed, I think it's important to recognize that eating disorders are not black and white. It's not always: you have one or you don't. And we absolutely cannot tell if someone has one by their weight. Any and all disordered thoughts and behavior need to be cared for. But unfortunately, in our culture, many of these disordered thoughts and behaviors are praised as being "healthy" (i.e.: restrictive diets, over-exercising, obsession with clean eating, intermittent fasting, attaching morality to food choices... the list goes on).

Anyways, from that point on, I made it my mission to dive deep into discovering why I had such a horrible relationship with my body. I didn't know health coaching existed. I didn't know how to get a therapist. I was to ashamed to tell my parents anything, so I dare not ask them to help me find said therapist.

So I went at it alone. And lucky for me, due to the nature of my research in college (health communication) and my yoga practice, I eventually found my way out. 

It took me awhile (years) but I found my way to the other side, the life I live today: of loving my body from the inside out.

It's now my passion to spread this body love as far and wide as possible.

And I because I can't coach everyone privately, I created the Powerfully Imperfect Program. 

I synthesized everything I've learned from my own personal journey, my graduate school research in body image, my yoga practice, and my coaching studies/experience into a seven step plan to help you retrain your brain, to carefully, systematically rewire the way you see yourself.

I know that body love starts from the inside. And I am so excited to share this program with you.

So what are you waiting for? Say yes. Decide that now is your time to love your body. That you're worth your time and energy. 

The 28-Day Program begins March 18! Holler at me with any questions you have.

Powerfully Imperfect

Last Monday morning I woke up in Tucson and realized I packed all the wrong clothes for my health coaching retreat. I packed for 80 degrees. It was 30 degrees.

Luckily, I packed jeans. Unluckily the only top was a jean button-down. I made do, threw it on, added my purple scarf and then to top it all off: hello flip flops. My toes weren't painted. My hair was in a messy bun.

When I got to the resort, everyone else was wearing cute biz casual outfits, hair done, nails (obviously) done. And then there was me. 

The time came for the Health Coach Institute co-founder, Carey, to invite one of us on stage in front of 180 people to get coached. This is an incredible opportunity, and one that in the past, I had been WAY TOO SCARED to put my hand up for.

But low and behold, in my insane outfit and everything, my hand shot up. Deep down I thought, "there's no way she'll pick me."

..."You! With the purple scarf and glasses!" 

I looked around. Shit. Nobody else was wearing a purple scarf... so up to the stage I went. Flip flops and all.

The old me never would have raised my hand for two reasons: 1. Being scared and 2. HELLO I LOOK INSANE!

But the Monday me remembered my intention to be vulnerable and said, hell with it, I don't care, let's do it.

And I'm so glad I did, because what would unfold would be life changing.

Carey coached me through a powerful sequence on "Daring to Be Seen and Heard."

As we worked through things, I ended up telling a story from high school. How I was in the show choir and in musicals, and I loved to sing, but hated solos. I was way too afraid to mess up in front of everyone. It wasn't only that I was afraid to mess up, I was afraid to A. Show the world I'm not a perfect singer and B. Make anyone feel uncomfortable by my imperfect singing.

We kept going. And I realized I needed to let go of A. Needing to be perfect and get everything right, B. Worrying so much about what everyone else thinks about me, C. Taking responsibility for other people's feelings. God forbid I make them feel uncomfortable.

At the end of the coaching sequence Carey asked me to declare my "power statement," a statement that would embody what I wanted to step into. Without any hesitation the words came flowing out of me:

I am powerfully imperfect.

I realized that when I own my imperfections and let myself be seen and heard anyways, I empower others to do the same. Collectively, we all get to take our masks off and live authentically. We can take risks, chase our dreams, make mistakes and some more mistakes, and it's all ok.

Carey then asked me what "empowered action" I would like to take to step into this new space of being Powerfully Imperfect. I paused, thinking.

Just then, someone yelled, "SING!" And before I knew it, everyone was chanting, "SING, SING, SING!"


My heart was pounding. There was no getting out of this.

I was terrified. But I also realized, singing would be my way of fully embodying my powerfully imperfect self. I KNEW when I sang, my voice would shake. I knew I'd probably miss a note. I knew it wouldn't be my best, "perfect" performance. 

And wasn't that the point? Wasn't messing up and showing my flaws the very point of being powerfully imperfect?

It was then that someone yelled, "SING AMAZING GRACE!"

And at that moment I knew that was exactly what I needed: grace to let myself be powerfully and imperfectly seen and heard. 

So I opened my mouth and sang.

My voice cracked. My notes were shaky. But others were good. 

But it didn't matter. For the first time, I messed up, in front of 180 people, and there was no warm wash of shame. My cheeks didn't get red. My heart didn't drop into my stomach. There was no embarrassment.

I was powerfully imperfect.

This was a game changer for me. 

It's something I've already owned when it comes to my body, but it was something I hadn't yet owned when it came down to letting myself be seen and heard in other spaces.

To say I felt liberated is an understatement. And I still do.

And to prove this point even more, the power of imperfection, I wrote you this without editing it. You're getting the raw, imperfect edition of my thoughts.

So there you go. My hope is that you, too, are able to be powerfully imperfect.

Why Fat Isn't the Problem and Dieting Is. A Health at Every Size Overview.

As long as I can remember, I’ve been told that weight loss equates to better health. That I must weigh a certain number and look a certain way in order to be healthy (and beautiful). For me this resulted in disordered eating and exercising behaviors as well as years of body hate, distraction and stress.

Then, I discovered the truth. It started organically. I started to realize that my mental health was deteriorating because of my want to fit the “ideal” mold and that my constant dieting, body-obsessed/stressed life had to stop for me to actually live a healthy life.

I just had this intuitive hunch that my health was not determined by my size. And even more so, that for me, being healthy included enjoying dinners out with my friends where I could order the cheeseburger and enjoy it without stress and guilt.

Then I discovered that my hunch was on to something. Thanks to instagram, YES, instagram, I found out there was an actual thing called Intuitive Eating.

When I first read Intuitive Eating I was in a state of awe. It was like OH MY GOSH THERE ARE WORDS AND RESEARCH AND ACTUAL TOOLS THAT DESCRIBE MY OWN PERSONAL JOURNEY! I couldn’t believe it. There was a real, science-backed reason why I had such a terrible relationship with food and my body, and my hunch was right! Health DOES include being able to eat food without guilt and stress!

 Then I found Health at Every Size (HAES) and my mind was blown even further. HAES is filled with information that proves, scientifically PROVES that dieting is the real problem, not our weight or that fat on my butt!

I honestly felt liberated.

As I moved fully into this Intuitive Eating/HAES framework and have begun to be more vocal about it, it’s been interesting, to say the least-- especially because I  worked in the fitness world.

There are people who love it, who are totally on board or want to learn more. These people thank me.

And then there are the people who aren’t so sure about this whole thing and just don’t care very much either way (whatevs!)

And then there are the people who don’t understand it (rightly so, it’s not the norm!) and thus think it’s a bad thing, that I’m promoting an unhealthy lifestyle. I’ve actually been attacked because of my beliefs in this area.

So I wanted to provide a brief overview of what this whole HAES thing is all about and provide you with some facts that I find to be incredibly empowering. I want to increase understanding around HAES and debunk some myths about it.

Let’s start talking about the health risks of fat. We’ve been told our entire lives that we need to lose weight because FAT KILLS.

However, according to Linda Bacon, PhD in her book HAES, “the benefits of weight loss have been misinterpreted and exaggerated. At both extremes—high and low—body weight adversely affects health. But the vast majority of Americans fall closer to the middle of the body fat bell curve, where weight is little more than a benign marker of an individual’s genetic predisposition to carry it.”

Bacon also reports that being fat is not a death sentence. In fact, she states, “almost all epidemiological studies indicate people in the overweight or moderately obese categories live at least as long—or longer—than people in the normal weight category…. An analysis of the National Health and Nutrition Examination Surveys I, II, and III, which followed the largest nationally representative cohort of U.S. adults, also determined that the “ideal” weight for longevity was in the ‘overweight’ category.”

What?! So fat isn’t really that big of a deal? Nop, the research shows us: it’s really not.

So here you might be thinking, wait does HAES encourage people to gain weight?


HAES simply says that some of us are more genetically inclined to have more body fat than others. Some people are naturally thin, while others naturally have more fat. And that’s OK.

Furthermore, weight/fat gain is often caused by, dun dun dun: DIETING! And the more diets we go on, the most likely we are to gain weight in the future and raise our “set point,” which is the regulated weight our body wants to maintain. (Yes, our bodies have biological mechanisms that work to maintain a typical weight range for each unique body).

What! Yeah.

The HAES research says that in most cases (extremes are the exception) fat isn’t what matters.  In fact, that fat may help us live longer lives and cope better with a variety of diseases! Cool!

 In most cases, fat just doesn’t matter that much. What DOES matter is that we take care of ourselves. “It is well established that the relationship between activity and longevity is stronger than the relationship between weight and longevity,” says Bacon.

So what does that mean? It means what actually matters is that we move our bodies, what doesn’t matter as much is what we weigh.

Here’s some more crazy information: most diseases blamed on fat actually aren’t typically a result of FAT itself, they’re actually a result of things like living a sedentary lifestyle, not paying any attention to nutrition, being sleep deprived, chronically stressed, etc. So fat itself isn’t the problem. Weight loss isn’t the solution.

However, we are consistently told that if we are fat, we need to lose weight.

Unfortunately, Bacon reports that, “weight fluctuation (from dieting) is strongly associated with increased risk for diabetes, hypertension, and cardiovascular diseases, independent of body weight. In other words, the recommendation to diet may be causing the very diseases it is purported to prevent!”

Mind blown? Mine was.

What matters is that we drop the stigma and shame around fat. According to Bacon, “cross-cultural studies suggest that larger people are not subject to the same diseases in countries where there is less stigma attached to weight.” This, she says isn’t surprising because of the strong connection between stigma and stress… and as most of us know, it is stress that is the culprit for most diseases.

Because studies consistently show that restrictive diets lead to future weight gain and disease, HAES includes a powerful intuitive eating framework that empowers people to build healthy habits in an easy, accessible, sustainable way to change their lifestyle for good. It empowers people to feel freedom around food, rather than war.

That is what matters: doing things daily to take care of ourselves. What doesn’t matter is if we end up losing tons of weight or not.

Weight loss is the wrong prescription to disease. The right prescription? Healthy life-style habits.

When I talk to my clients about this, some come to me wanting to lose weight. I acknowledge this desire, and gently ask if we can put it on the back burner so that we can effectively focus in on the principles of HAES/intuitive eating. This allows my clients to get to know their bodies on a deeper level and transform their relationship with their bodies so that they can take good care of themselves forever, not just for a month or two.

What I assure them is this: we focus on building lifelong healthy habits that make them feel good every day. These habits transform their health and happiness. This is what matters: consistently showing ourselves kindness.

If someone’s body truly needs to lose weight, weight loss may be a result over the long term. But it also might not (due to the studies that show our bodies really hate losing weight, but that’s a subject for another day).

The incredible thing that HAES/Intuitive Eating approach shows is that our health improves drastically when we develop these loving healthy habits, regardless of weight loss.

Want some science to prove this? Ok great, because I have it for you.

With a grant from the National Institutes of Health, Bacon performed a study through the University of California, Davis that recruited 70 non-smoking, Caucasian women between the ages of 30 and 45 who wore at least a size 16. She needed 70 people because that is what would determine statistical significance (ahh, so happy my master’s degree is coming in handy here, hehe).

They also needed subjects to be similar in gender and ethnicity, which is why they studied Caucasian women.

There were two groups in the study.

One group was in a dieting group, they received conventional messages about dieting and attitudes about their body for a year. They did things that a normal diet would do:

·      Restricted fat and calorie intake

·      Encouraged to monitor diet with a food journal

·      Weigh themselves weekly

·      Walk or participate in exercise

The other group was the HAES group. They received a copy of the HAES book that was still in draft form. Their year-long program focused on:

·      Enhancing body acceptance and self-acceptance

·      Living a full life regardless of weight

·      Disconnecting their feelings of self-worth from their weight

·      Nutrition information

·      Activity

·      Lifestyle choices

Ok so what were the results? The HAES group did SIGNIFICANTLY better than the dieting group.

The HAES group:

·      Overcame their struggles with food

·      Became intuitive eaters, free to eat what they want, when they want, in an empowered way

·      Improved their body image and self-esteem

·      Showed significant declines in “bad” cholesterol (LDL)

·      Showed significant declines in blood pressure

·      Almost quadrupled the amount of energy they spent being active

·      Reported feeling more vital and enjoyed their bodies more

The Dieting group:

·      Showed initial weight loss, only to regain it and return to their original size by the end of the year

·      Blood pressure, LDL, activity level, and depression either stayed the same or worsened

·      Almost half of the dieters dropped out (compared to the 8% of the HAES group) showing that people don’t stick to diets

·      Self-esteem plummeted

Yikes! Crazy, right? So what can we do? We can say ENOUGH ALREADY to the diet culture that tells us we must lose weight and be a certain size to be healthy and beautiful. We can work to accept our bodies as they area right now and start treating them with the love and care that they deserve.

We can read books like HAES, Intuitive Eating, and Body Kindness and work on adapting the HAES/intuitive eating principles, or get a coach if you struggle with this on your own.

We can fill our instagram feeds with people of size diversity and who advocate for HAES/Intuitive eating. My favorites are:







We can listen to podcasts like Food Psyche by Christy Harrison to surround ourselves with EMPOWERING, healthy messages rather than the opposite.

We can work hard to change our beliefs on health and beauty.

We can work to accept our bodies just as they are and say good-bye to the societal ideal.

We can practice showing ourselves compassion and love.

We can move our bodies because we love ourselves and want to take care of ourselves, instead of punishing ourselves for food we ate.

We can discover and eat foods that make us feel alive, energized and fabulous.

We can prioritize things like sleep and drinking lots of water to stay hydrated.

We can prioritize having fun because it’s good for our health! (Bye-bye, stress!)

We can surround ourselves with people who support us in this radical journey to self-acceptance.

So there you have it. An overview on HAES. I highly recommend reading the book, as it provides study after study that reveals the real truth behind our weight. This article just skims the surface.

If even one person reads this and has some sort of breakthrough, mind-blowing, ah-ha moment, well then, my job is done.

Cheers to loving your body + living your life, friends.







How to "Look Your Best" on Your Wedding Day

Here's why I love one-on-one coaching. I'll go in with a basic plan for the session, but then while talking about what went great that week, and what was challenging, often something will come up that we'll end up giving all of our attention to. No, we aren't getting derailed, we have this unique opportunity to dive deeper into something important that is happening. This is the power of one-on-one coaching. 

I'll share an example from this week, which came at a perfect time, as yesterday, I purchased my wedding dress =)

I was on a call with one of my wonderful clients. She told me she knows the engagement ring is coming, and she asked me if I felt pulled back into the world of dieting when I got engaged, due to the pressure of looking my best on my wedding day.

I was really happy to share with her that, no, I have gotten to a place in my intuitive eating journey where I'm able to appreciate my body for all that it is (and all that it's not!), I'm healthy and happy knowing this is my body's natural size and weight. No, I'm not a size 2, and I'll never be, because that wouldn't be healthy (or realistic with my hips... hah!) So, no, I don't feel pressured to lose weight before our wedding, like I know many brides do. It's what all the media/magazines/everyone tells us we need to do, after all.

But this launched us into a really incredible coaching conversation around where this "belief" comes from: the belief that we need to "look our best" on our wedding day, which to my client meant looking skinny.

And as we dug deeper into it, we uncovered the 'why' (deep set cultural norms and ideals), and then we began to challenge it.

My client told me that she had been skinner in her life, and that when she was at her skinniest, she was actually her most unhealthy and most miserable. 

I've had a similar experience. And it reminded me of the very last diet I went on. It was a 24-day "cleanse" and I ended up losing 10 pounds and a few inches. And was I happy? Confident? Full of love for my body?

No. I felt withdrawn and distracted. I had to be a hermit in order to avoid social situations with food and alcohol. I felt guilty. Shameful. I still wasn't satisfied with how my body looked. The scale owned me. 

But wow was this powerful. Because this experience showed me that a getting to a certain size would not bring me happiness, nor would it bring me body love. In fact, it brought the opposite. That was not my natural body size, and therefore, the things I had to do to achieve it turned me into a miserable human.

When I dieted, I deprived myself of the joy of showing up for the people in my life.

She, too, resonated with this.

And at this point there was a powerful breakthrough. My client realized that she doesn't have to buy into the idea that she needs to be "skinny" for her wedding. She gets to decide, she gets to CHOOSE what "looking great means" to her. 

And you know what that came down to for my client (and for me)?

Who we are BEING on our wedding days.

So instead of thinking, "I need to look my best," she shifted her desire and told me, "I want to BE my best self on my wedding day." 

I got chills as my client told me how she wants to show up on her wedding day. How she wants to be her best self for her future husband, for them as a unit. And how that means being able to show up fully for herself and him. And you know what that means? Letting go of food and body stress, so that she's not distracted and instead able to be happy and present for herself and her man. 

"It's about so much more than food," she said. "It's about who I am as a person."

And THAT, my friends, is how you look your best on your wedding day.

It's not about food. It's about who you are as a person.

If you're reading this thinking you want to get to this place of body acceptance and food/exercise freedom, too, join me for a Discovery Session. I'd love to talk to you about your unique relationship to food, exercise and body image. One-on-one coaching provides a powerful platform for transformation from the inside out. Spaces are filling up, so don't wait if you want in! 

And remember: my special 28-Day Love Your Body, Live Your Life Package has early bird pricing until December 13!

Fear Has a Loving Intention.

I want to share a moment with you from a coaching session last week that gave me chill bumps.

A client and I were heading into the fourth week on our intuitive eating journey, and as we talked about what went well, my client described to me the freedom she had been experiencing with food! She had some pretty incredible moments of honoring her cravings, choosing food that truly satisfied her, and thus feeling empowered to honor her hunger and fullness. She told me how good it felt, she didn't feel guilty when she enjoyed a sweet treat, and was easily able to stop eating it when she noticed she was full! 

Later in our call, she bravely told me how she was also afraid. And as we dug deeper, we uncovered that the fear came from this newfound freedom she was experiencing. This new freedom was freaking her out! I honestly got the chills because I know this is a sign of deep inner transformation.

If you also come from a place of living in the world of strict diet rules and an "eat this not that" mentality, then entering into the world of intuitive eating can certainly be scary! I know because I went through it, too. It's something so totally different than what we're used to... and therefore, AHH!

There's a part of our brain that is in charge of the "fight or flight" response, many call it the "critter brain" -- and if it senses that we are in danger, it arouses fear and is like ALERT ALERT ALERT: STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND GET BACK TO SAFETY!

Fear, ultimately, has a loving intention: it wants to keep us safe! So nice of you, fear! However, fear doesn't understand when we're doing things that are good for us... like healing our relationship with food, it only knows what it's used to... and what it's used to is thus considered "safe." So to the critter brain, having a war-on-food mentality is safety. So you better believe it's going to want to keep us there, aka "safe."

That's how fear can hold us back if we're not careful. This can apply to ANY change you want to make in your life. And sometimes our fear is subconscious, which is even tricker! Then what happens is we'll likely self sabotage to keep us in this "safe" place. Ever feel like you want to make a change, have tried and just get "stuck?"  Yeah... I betchya that's this idea at play...!

However, if we know this... fear can be so EMPOWERING. Why? Because if I'm afraid, it's a pretty amazing indicator that I'm doing something worthwhile, I'm challenging myself... even more? It's a sign that I'm GROWING.  That I'm evolving in a big way that has my well-intentioned critter brain screaming RETREAT RETREAT RETREAT because I'm entering into new personal growth territory.

As we grow, evolve and become more authentic versions of ourselves, I encourage you to invite fear to join you along the journey, and to even see it as a sign that you're well on your way.

I purposefully will not comment on your weight, especially if you lose some. Or even lots.

Health, strength and beauty have nothing to do with how we look in a bikini. Nor are they defined by a size. We are, right now, strong & beautiful women.

I purposefully will not comment on your weight, especially if you lose some. Or even lots.

I’ll comment on your smile, your generosity, your thoughtfulness and your ambition. I’ll compliment your adorable new glasses or your rocking’ new boots. But no, I’m not going to comment on your weight loss.

I’m never going to tell you “you look great!” just because there is less of you standing in front of me. Because you’ve “looked great” all along. I’ve seen what makes you shine, all along.

I’ll choose to compliment you on your empowered actions, when you say yes to yourself. When you tell me you listen to your body. I’ll compliment you when I see you showing yourself love, or when you make yourself a priority. I’ll compliment you on powering through when times get tough. I’ll compliment you when you face your fears and embark on something new. But I promise to never say “you look great!” just because of weight lost.

See, when people used to comment on my weight loss, I’d feel SO good. It was like a high. That was the best compliment anyone could give me. It directly fed my addiction to the damaging diet mentality. It encouraged me to stay in a terrible mental space: to limit my food intake, to say terrible things to myself when I “messed up” my diet, to binge, to do other things I really don’t want to talk about here. A compliment on my skinner body told me that YES, I must need to be this size to be pretty and “look great.”

The irony is that the times I was my “skinniest” and on the most rigid diet were also the times I was the most unhappy and unhealthy... but that doesn’t show on the outside.

That’s why, no, I’ll never comment on your weight loss.

Because “YOU LOOK GREAT!” Right NOW.

And when we fully believe this? Transformation happens. 

Ready, Set: GOAL

With the start of every new season, I like to take time to reflect on all the successes, all the challenges, all the things I'm grateful for from the previous season. This helps me focus in on what I want to send my energy towards in this new season ahead. What do I want to accomplish this fall?

It's easy to just let the days pass... summer flies by, and then holy crap Labor Day is here... it's fall. And then it's Christmas, and oh my gosh then it's NEW YEAR'S EVE. 


Let's slow things down, yeah?! Ok great. Let's take time, even just 10 minutes, to check in: are we making the most of each day? Of each season? Or are we just rushing through life?

I invite you to join me on my seasonal reflection. 

Think back on your summer... and think about each of these items. If you're a journal person, have at it. Otherwise, just think these through.

  • What are three things you're super proud of doing this summer?
  • What risks did you take?
  • What scared you?
  • What surprised you?
  • What thrilled you?
  • What challenged you?
  • What did you do that made you feel most alive, most yourself?
  • Did you accomplish a goal you were working towards?
  • What are 5 things you're grateful for?

After taking time to reflect on these questions, you may notice that things come up for you... you may think about something in a new way, or be inspired to do something new... carry thoughts with you as you reflect on the following questions for fall.

  • What is one thing you could do for yourself this fall to help you feel more energized, full of life, happier in your every day?
    • examples: more sleep, meditation, going for walks, taking a trip, calling an old friend...
  • What is one specific goal you want to work towards?
  • Why does this goal matter to you?
  • How might life change for the better if you accomplish this goal?
  • What would be the best part about achieving this goal be?
  • How can you make space for this goal?

Goal setting is exciting. It's powerful to take time to set a vision for what we want to do, to really visualize what it would look like, what it would feel like. Sometimes, we set a goal and don't take the time to think about why it actually matters.

And guess what? THAT MATTERS! A goal with out a reason, a goal without passion is... quite honestly? A waste. To accomplish a goal, we have to truly care about it and how it will impact our lives. 

If we start to send our energy towards our goal, to do something little every day to work towards this goal, we'll get there. Especially if we believe we will. Whether it's just thinking about it, talking about it, taking little steps towards this big picture... where we send our energy matters.

If we send energy towards something negative, we feed that negativity! But if we send our energy towards something positive-we feed positive- we feed our goals, our highest vision for ourselves.

So I ask you... what do you want to accomplish this fall? Take the risk. Invest in yourself. Ask for support. And know that I'll be here cheering you on the whole way through. 

Have a wonderful Labor Day, everyone!

Let's Party!

By now, hopefully you've heard I launched my own health coaching biz (Julie Wojno Health Coaching!) And now... I want to celebrate!

I firmly believe in taking time to celebrate life, whether we throw a party or simply jot down an accomplishment we're proud of in our journal, taking time to say "hell yeah" is important.

And really I want you to join me! Seriously, it would mean the world. Yes, YOU! I wanna see ya! I've never been so excited to begin something as I am to begin health coaching... so let's do this.

Mark your calendar for Wednesday, September 20th. We'll enjoy some craft beer at Seventh Son's and my fave Trader Joe's/Whole Foods snacks from 7-9p (I reserved their beautiful private room for us, bring all your friends)!

You might think... "seriously, a health coach is having a party at a brewery?" 

And to that I say, "hell yeah I am!"

Photo by Autumn Theodore Photography

Photo by Autumn Theodore Photography

One of my core values in healthy living is that there is a time and a place for all foods (and drink), and that one of the healthiest things we can do for ourselves is to make peace with food, and listen to our bodies in order to best nourish ourselves.

Seriously, what's life if we deprive ourselves from our favorite things?

I don't even use words like "cheat meal" or "clean eating," because of the stigma it casts over food. These words, this kind of relationship with food, keeps us trapped in the War on Food. Language matters. Trust me on this one. Let's end the damn war already!

My health coaching philosophy is based in intuitive eating, where you learn to deeply tune in to listen to how, what and when your body wants to be nourished. We throw out the guidelines of "eat this, not that... at this time of day..." and instead honor our hunger and fullness, and choose foods that will make us feel energized and satisfy us. This frees us from being controlled by food. Bye-bye cycles of restriction and binging. 

True life: for my website photo shoot, I included photos at Seventh Son specifically to show that healthy living does not mean having some "perfect" (read: RESTRICTIVE) diet void of having fun! It's not ALL carrots and kale, people! It's actually that mindset of trying to be society's idea of "perfect," that can keep us stuck in a mentally unhealthy space. Let's focus on being present, rather than being perfect. In fact, let's create our own idea of perfect, for our own, unique lives.

My slogan is "love your body, live your life" for a reason, ya'll. And on Saturday, Sept. 20, let's live our lives a little and enjoy a delicious Humulus Nimbus (or a Jorts if they still have it on tap)! And of course, water and other non-alcoholic bevs will be available for anyone who doesn't want a beer. Because: do you, my people, do you!

I'm also going to have a spread of my absolute favorite Trader Joe's and Whole Foods snacks! From their sweet potato chips to the edamame hummus.... it's gonna be good. Real good. 

Feel free to bring friends, family... the more the merrier! But if you don't mind, RSVP via the Facebook Event, because it'll help out my peeps at Seventh Sons be prepared for the crowd! *Note: it's ok if you're like "I want to, but not sure yet!" RSVP anyways in case you do make it!

What's in a Logo? A Lot, Actually!

What. A. Week! 

Ever since Wednesday morning, when I hit the 'send' button to announce my new health coaching business, I feel like it's been a blur! I have been absolutely overwhelmed (in the good way!) from all the love and support.

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I am so excited about this new adventure! 

There's also someone else I want to thank, she's one of my oldest, and best friends: Kristen Nervo. When I was starting to get things going for my business, I gave Kristen a call, to see if she would design my logo. And did. she. ever.

I'm in love with it. It fully encompasses my health coaching (hell, my LIFE) philosophy... and so I wanted to take a minute to share it with you!

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Let's break it down.

The wheel: the wheel is the base, because a life in motion is a life well-lived. Our bodies were made to move. It doesn't matter how we move, we can walk, run, crawl, bike, jump, down dog, swim, dance, box... what does matter is that we find movement that we enjoy, movement that we crave, movement that empowers us and makes us feel alive.

The avocado: the avocado stands for fueling our bodies with nutrient dense food that tastes delicious and shows our bodies serious love. These foods energize us, make us feel good, and fuel us for a long, incredible life.

The donut: the (super adorable) donut is absolutely crucial in my logo! Because my philosophy of health is based in intuitive eating, where we listen to our bodies, eat and enjoy food that both fuels and satisfies us.... guilt free! I believe there is a time and a place for all food, that there is no such thing as a "cheat meal" because eating is not a game to be won or manipulated. I believe in breaking FREE of restrictive diets that keep us stuck. So, yeah... pass me the donut! 

The lotus flower: the lotus flower holds a special place in my heart. Lotus flowers grow in mud/muck. So the meaning of the lotus flower is that even in the mud, beauty grows and blossoms. When I think about my health and wellness journey, I was stuck in the mud for years, tormenting myself over achieving some impossible Hollywood unrealistic body. I was trapped. I was so far from healthy. But it has been in overcoming this, that I have found my voice, and my purpose... and that is a beautiful thing. The lotus, being a symbol often used in the yoga world, also adds in the element of mind-body connection: health of the whole person, not just the physical. 

So what's in a logo? Hmmm.... quite a bit =)

Thanks Kristen!

And thank you all for being a part of my community! I'm excited to share weekly recipes, yoga sequences, health/wellness insight/inspiration/ideas and action steps =) This is just the beginning.

Be a Doer, Not a Dreamer.

I've always looked at entrepreneurs with envy. How cool it would be to own my own business, do my own thing... 

 Then, at the beginning of this year I decided to stop dreaming, and start doing. 

If you read my blog, you know I'm passionate about cultivating a positive relationship to food and exercise. Starting as far back as college, when I entered the fitness world, I've been on a mission to change the script from working out/exercising to look a certain way, to feel a certain way. To help women health damaged relationships with food, exercise and body image.

I've always done this casually. In cycle or yoga classes... on my blog or instagram... and this was always my favorite part of teaching: forming meaningful relationships with my students and seeing them thrive via the strength and power they find on the bike or on the mat.

Now... I'm taking this whole thing a step further.

In September, I will officially be a Certified Health Coach. I've studying my ass off, immersing myself into the world of coaching from angles: my program curriculum, podcasts, books, articles, you name it... I've thrown myself all in.

My website is live and now I am SO excited to share it with you. Head over to to learn all about my new biz. What is health coaching? What does my program look like? How can you explore more? You can also join the community via weekly e-mails that will offer recipes, easy yoga sequences for an at-home practice, topics like the ones found here on "Thoughts," inspiration and more. 

I'll also be planning fun group coaching challenges around goal setting and habit change... I can't wait. 

Want in on the fun? Want to invest in yourself like you never have before? Let's team up. I want to work with you. I want to be your biggest cheerleader AND your tough love coach. My mission is to create lasting habit change to help you live the live you've always loved. My mission is to empower you to fully love your body and live your absolute best life. 


So let's do it. I'm offering free discovery sessions for anyone who is interested in learning more.

Cheers to new adventures. Cheers to being a doer, and not a dreamer.

Also... I just want to give a massive shout out to Autumn Theodore. Home girl did my photos and I am now so lucky to call her a friend. She is a truly incredible human: smart, ambitious, compassionate, courageous. And her photos are bomb. If you have photo needs, I cannot recommend her enough!!

Guest Blog: Why Safer Products Matter. By Alessandra Rogers

**UPDATE: until AUGUST 5 (aka PELOTONIA) use this link to purchase the amazing Beautycounter products and 15% will go towards my 100-mile ride to END CANCER!

I’m not going to lie, I am not one who does much to get all glammed up.  I often go to sleep without taking off makeup or brushing my teeth... I have never had a facial, I don’t know the first thing about hair and makeup... AND I am sad to say it, but my husband is disgusted by the little amount I shower (why I am admitting this, I do not know). 

Then... I found Beautycounter. What drew me in was learning how Beautycounter is dedicated to creating SAFE skincare, haircare, and makeup that are free of any and all toxic chemicals found in most products out there.

Yes please!

I became so passionate about the products, I became a consultant, and I started dive deep and learn why certain ingredients are used and why some ARE NOT.

Let's talk about toxins.

Count how many products you use daily.  Don’t forget shampoo, hand wash, face lotion, face wash, etc.  Now, each one of these products (9 times out of 10) has a plethora of harmful ingredients regardless of catchy “clean” words on the front of the package. EEK.  

We recognize that we can’t control everything our families eat or come into contact with, and life is about balance, but with Beautycounter, we can rest easy knowing we have one area covered. We can feel confident knowing that everything we’re putting on our bodies is safe and healthy.

Beautycounter will never use an ingredient related to human health risks, whether it be cancer, hormone disruptors, infertility, allergies, autoimmune etc. We all know someone that has been affected by one of these! While the research isn't fully out yet, they err on the side of caution! The ingredient screen is one of the strictest in the industry. In fact, Beautycounter has taken the EU regulations (…nearly 1,400 banned chemicals) and RUN with them banning over 1,500 ingredients in their products. Meanwhile the U.S. only bans 30.

When I approached Julie about Beautycounter (knowing she too cares about health and wellness), she, like me, said she didn’t use many products. But, also like me, her interest peaked when she started learning about the toxic chemicals found in other products. Yuck.

So what is all this buzz about Beautycounter?  Why should you care about what you put on your skin? You have been “okay so far,” right?

You see, your skin is your largest organ.  And too many of the ingredients in personal care products, even the ones approved by the U.S., are not safe. 

The stats are alarming. Organic doesn't mean toxin-free. Natural doesn't either. Just because something says it is free of Parabans doesn't make it safe. 

If you are a woman who intends on having kiddos, look into the research about what has been found in umbilical cord blood in 99 percent of women. It takes seconds for toxins to enter your bloodstream, and the toxins most personal care products contain can wreck havoc on your health (links to infertility, endocrine disruption, asthma, allergies, cancer, auto immune diseases) and the list goes on. 

Well, that's scary.  Enter: Beautycounter. SAFE products that actually work. 

Think Whole Foods meets Chanel… in fact, the Chief Scientific Officer, Xavier Ormancey, was with Chanel for 20 years!  In fact, he recently patented our latest lotion (we can’t wait to share information about it with you).  

Beautycounter is trying to change the world one step at a time.  They are a B corp, meaning they are trying to make a stance with Congress to get laws changed! The company is about education first.  Their secondary goal is to get safer products into the hands of everyone. 

WHAT? Education before sales? YES. 

They even go as far as letting you get your hands on every ingredient and handing out “never lists” so you can shop for safe products yourself, whether with them or not, by avoiding the listed ingredient.

They also have a reason why they use EVERY ingredient in their products.  You will never see unnecessary fillers in their products. No fillers is actually HUGE. See, without fillers the products last and last and last.  I can’t begin to tell you how often I was over-using the products at first because I was so used to products containing fillers.

Here’s the deal, the company is on a mission to change laws and help us to be safe. The products work, they last a long time, they are safe while pregnant, for your kids and a lot of dudes are even hopping on the band wagon. 

The company even has a 60 day return policy for used products because they want you to have a chance to continuously use the products and get results you want.  Who does that?! An amazing company that cares.  And we want to help spread the word because once you know better, you do better, right?! Right.

So come try out the products for yourself, I'll be at Studio 543 with Julie on Saturday, July 8th for her Pelotonia fundraiser! Here are the deets:

What: a 60-minute hot vinyasa flow (taught by Julie) followed by Beautycounter samples and shopping in the lobby! We'll have raffle prizes and discounted Beautycounter products! Best part? 15% of the Beautycounter sales go straight to Julie's 100-mile Pelotonia ride to END CANCER.

When: Saturday, July 8 at 10:30am

Where: Studio 543 Yoga Inferno!

Cost: $20 donation at the door! (But you can save your spot now, click here!)


Be Ideal.

If you live in Columbus and have turned on the radio (specifically WNCI), you've probably heard commercials for that "Ideal Image" place that wants to freeze your fat and give you the perfect bikini line, and who knows what else they do.

Their tagline is "be ideal."

Ohhhh the word "ideal." This word is PACKED with all sorts of interesting stuff.

I began going to the gym in the seventh grade. Yes, as in I'd get on the elliptical and "work out" with the goal of burning calories. I wanted, no, I needed to have an "ideal body." Everyone around me (family, friends) was super skinny, it was the age of Nicole Ritchie and Paris Hilton, and basically every adult I knew was very vocally on a diet, or moaning about how they should be on one.

Meanwhile, I had a very average-sized body, not super skinny, not overweight, oh, but I had curves, as in boobs and a butt starting in sixth grade. To me, normal body weight plus big boobs and butt meant I was "big." I didn't look like the skinny girls around me who were praised for being "so tiny!" They had ideal bodies, I thought.

From then through my sophomore/junior year in college, to say I had a horrible relationship with food and exercise is an understatement. When I looked in the mirror, I always saw what was wrong. 

Yoga was the first thing to begin the transformation of my relationship with my body. I started my yoga practice my sophomore year in college.

But what really helped accelerate my shift was when I began studying health communication during my junior year in college. I had the most incredible professor, who is a friend still today. I had always been curious about how communication impacts health behavior and body image, and this was my chance to start studying it.

I knew that growing up, magazines and the media, and even just run of the mill "fat talk" at home or at school were at the root of my disordered relationship with my body. I wanted to dive deeper and uncover how these messages function. So I did. 

After graduating form Boston College, I went to Ohio State to do more. In my research, one of the theories I came across and used in my thesis was called Self-Discrepancy theory.

It gets super complex, but I'll just keep it simple here.

What it boils down to is our ideas of our "ought self" and our "ideal self" versus our "actual self."

  • Ought-self: who we think we should be based on others' opinions (or what we think others' opinions are).
  • Ideal-self: this is often rooted in our ought-self, but it is the standard we hold ourselves to, the person we want to be.
  • Actual-self: the person we actually are.

So, let's look at High School/Freshman Year College Julie:

My my ideal self was based upon my ought self. I thought I "ought" to have little to no body fat in order to be ideal (and especially to work in fitness). 

And when I looked at my actual self, I obviously fell short. Because, hi, having little to no body fat is a specific body type few people have and/or are capable of achieving. And, with my naturally curvy frame... being the kind of skinny I thought I should be was straight up IMPOSSIBLE. 

Therefore, there was this HUGE discrepancy between who I was and who I thought I should be.

Herein lies the issue: when our actual selves don't measure up to our ideal selves... and this often stems from the "ought self," which we form based on how we are influenced by all sorts of external factors, which for me meant: media, culture, fitness industry, childhood. 

Fast forward. Lots of self-reflection and personal growth on the whole diet and exercise front later,  I began to realize how for me, being healthy meant enjoying a cheese burger and a beer without guilt, without feeling like a bad person. I started to see that no matter how hard I tried, I would never have that zero-body-fat body, and even trying to achieve that would mean a life of social isolation and absolute misery, and honestly? Starvation. That was not a life I wanted to live. It was neither mentally, physically, or emotionally healthy.

I wanted to exercise to feel good, not to punish myself.

I wanted to eat healthy food to nourish and love myself.

I also wanted to eat pizza to nourish and love myself in a  whole different way.

It is only recently that I picked up a book on Intuitive Eating. I had seen some really awesome instagram and blog posts about Intuitive Eating by a local health coach, Simi Botic, and I always thought, damn this girl is totally aligned with my philosophy on health... which, honestly, I felt was rare. Very rare. Everyone else was on some cleanse, or praising "clean food" or something... eat this/not that... #bikinibody.

So I knew I had to check out intuitive eating. Low and behold I felt like I was reading my own journey in the book. Intuitive Eating is all about deeply getting to know your body, and learning to listen to your body and nourish it according to what you are craving, what will bring pleasure, what will fuel you best, without external rules or regulations. It uncovers how diets have destroyed all intuition we naturally have around food, and how diets have created this society of deprivation and binging cycles and ultimately, an all out war on food and our bodies.

My favorite part of the book was the chapter on respecting your body. One thing this chapter asks you to do is embrace your body AS IT IS. Not as it would be 10 pounds lighter, but to just completely and fully love your body right now. And to love your body for it's unique shape and to stop striving for some insane ideal that, quite frankly, probably is impossible to achieve! It asks you to see your body for what it is. Not for what you think it should be, or could be, or what you want it to be, but to embrace your body as it is.

Guess what? When I actually started to genuinely LOVE my body... I started treating it with love.

This was huge for me. This is what I've been working on all along. Embracing my curves, the fat on my belly, the cellulite on my butt. This is my body. I am strong, I am healthy, and it's never going to be that zero-fat body. And you know what? I love that. I love it! It's my body, it's uniquely my own, and I absolutely love all that it is capable of, and all that it has been through and will go through.

This ties so well into my nerdy theory on self-discrepancy. And here's the cool thing about self-discrepancy theory... sure, it uncovers why so many of us have disordered relationships with food and exercise... but it also shows the way out of this war... we just need to shift our ideal. We need to throw the "oughts," "shoulds," "coulds" out the window and define our own ideal.

Our thoughts create our reality. And guess what? We control our thoughts. We control our ideal. We can create any ideal self we want.

Once I shifted my ideal-self, my world changed and all of a sudden I was free from the war on food I had been in my entire life.

Powerful stuff.

So I ask you this...

Think about your "ideal-self." Then, take time, lots of time, a day, a week, a month, A YEAR... to reflect on why you hold this ideal, how did these beliefs form?

Then... I ask you to really challenge this ideal-self.  Is this truly your ideal-self? What would life look like if you achieved that ideal self? Will this ideal-self bring you happiness? Is it realistic?

Or... is there a different self... perhaps even the one you are right now... that is so much better than your 'old' ideal. Start to focus your energy on her. 

I'm excited to be working on something that will allow me to share my journey and my knowledge in a bigger way with you all... stay tuned for more on that in the coming months... I absolutely cannot wait to share it with you!


All or Nothing... or Is It?

Every Friday at Ashtanga Yoga Columbus, we have "led practice," where one of our fabulous teachers leads the crew through the primary series, cued like a more traditional style yoga class (only this one is 99% in sanskrit).

This is different than any other day at AYC, where we practice Mysore style and can show up whenever we want and start working on our own practice at our own pace and stop at our own personal stopping point (guided by our teachers).

Led Fridays are AWESOME. There's something about that packed room, the energy, seeing everyone before class, all breathing and moving together.

But here's the thing: led class begins at 5:30am. I usually begin my Mysore practice at 4:30am. And, the entire primary series takes awhile... so it doesn't end until almost 7am. Guess who usually gets to work between 7 and 7:15am? 

This girl.

So I really struggle because I'm like, "shit I hate leaving early." I stress out, I feel guilty, I'm like blahhhhh I JUST WANT TO STAYYYY.

This last Friday, I was chatting with a fellow Ashtangi next to me about the "pains" of leaving early, and she was like yeah, ya know, I almost didn't show this morning, I thought about just doing a home practice instead because I knew I had to leave early. I was like yup, I really debated just skipping the whole thing today since I knew I could only stay for 40 minutes.

But we both agreed that even though we could only stay for the standing sequence, there's something so wonderful about practicing at the Shala. So we both showed up. And we both just agreed to enjoy the standing sequence and drop the stress of wanting to do one. more. pose.

And this simple conversation reminded me of something that is SO important and plays into so many areas of life: the 'all or nothing' mentality.

I almost just skipped practice just because I couldn't stay to do it all. All or nothing.

Instead, I went for 40 minutes, had a wonderful practice, and you know what? That was great! 

It doesn't have to be all or nothing. It's about presence, not perfection or duration...

The same all or nothing mentality used to plague my eating. I would think I HAVE TO EAT PERFECTLY, AND IF I HAVE ONE FREAKING COOKIE, I AM BAD, I MESSED UP, I JUST SCREWED UP EVERYTHING. 

Sometimes I would just feel like crap (super guilty) having "broken" my "healthy streak." Other times this would translate into binges of like, welp, might as well just keep this thang going and go WILD!

Ummmmmmm....Yeah. All or nothing.

I've worked hard to overcome my terrible relationship with food. If you know me now (or read this blog), you know that I firmly believe in enjoying things like donuts, cheese burgers and pizza without guilt. In fact, last night I had a super juicy burger at City Tavern in Italian Village and it ROCKED. I actually see these experiences as healthy. I really do. 

This all or nothing mentality has also impacted my exercise life. There were times when my workout was only considered "good" or "worthy" if I really pushed it to the extreme. All nor nothing. And if I ever went a day without exercise... yikes. 

Luckily, over the years, I have been able to work on dropping this damaging mentality. Little by little, finding balance and moderation, and being ok when that balance inevitably gets off kilter. That's ok, too. 

Recently, this work has come front in center in my yoga practice. I've been experiencing some extreme hip tightness that has impacted my ability to do a lotus on my left side...which I used to do with ease, and... let's just say you lotus a LOT during the primary series in Ashtanga.

Instead of feeling like "I suck," because I am unable to "give my all," or instead of staying home and not practicing because I can't lotus, I have still been showing up, I've been listening to my body, and modifying when I need to.

And while the old me would have felt:

A.  embarrassed to be modifying (OMG people are going to judge me) **newsflash, if a yogi is judging your practice... that person is missing a MASSIVE part of what yoga actually is... (cough cough non-judgement)

B. like a failure because I couldn't "give my all." 

The current me knows that it doesn't have to be all or nothing.

The current me, thanks to wonderful teachers, has actually been able to turn this injury experience into something so valuable.

I've been working on kindness and compassion within myself during these moments of modification. When my left leg screams at me, I back off, I send love there, and I drop self-judgement. I'm working on not criticizing myself for having a "bad" practice just because I couldn't fucking lotus on my left side.

This is powerful. This is game changing. This is me practicing self-love in a very real and tangible way. And this same lesson shows up in my every day all the time, and I'm now better able to not be so harsh with myself. 

Rarely in life is anything all or nothing. And actually... if I think something is... that is probably an indication I need to explore this "thing" more and reconsider my perspective. 

My intention is this: when I find myself slipping into an "all or nothing"  mentality, I stop and think... hmmm... can I instead find the 'or'?



Thoughts on Beauty.

This April, the yama I’ve been studying and focusing on is bramachrya, nonexcess, and it’s gotten me thinking about beauty.

So often, I hear people talk about exercising and dieting because they want to look a certain way. I know I used to do that, too. For years, I would kill myself at the gym and had a terrible relationship with food because I was striving to fit society's mold.

It’s not our fault, though. Our culture is heavily concentrated on looks. Every where I turn I see and hear messages telling me what I should look like, and I see people going to extraordinary lengths to fit this ideal: 

Hours at the gym, counting calories, eating this and not that, faux eyelashes, tattooed eyebrows, hair extensions, tans, heck, even surgeries. Not to mention the amount of money and time spent on makeup, beauty products, clothes…

But of course, right? I mean, literally every day we are told not only how we should look, but we are told that our worth depends on it.

Heck, I felt this message (this problem) was so prevalent, I went to graduate school to research its influences.

And now that May is rolling around the corner, god save us all, we’re entering into the dreaded “bikini body” season, where all of a sudden magazines and instagram tell us our worth boils down to how we look on the fucking beach #bikinbodyseries.

Ugh. Gag me. 

This culture brings me back to April’s yama: bramachrya, nonexcess.

Let it be said: I love getting dolled up just as much as the next girl. Getting new clothes that make me feel great? LOVE IT! And there is nothing wrong with makeup or faux eyelashes, or just wanting to look good in general... it’s all well and good. 

…To a point.

What IS harmful is when we cross the line of having fun with beauty, and enter into the realm of excess… when we become attached to the NEED to look a particular way and think we must look this way to be valued, worthy, loved, beautiful.

What I find damaging is overwhelming value we, as individuals and a culture, place on beauty.

It's toxic. I’ve been there, stuck in that place of thinking my worth is based on my beauty. That’s why I was addicted to exercise and beat myself up over everything I put in my mouth.  

I needed to be stick-skinny to be loved. If there was any fat on my belly, I better cover it the fuck up. God forbid I leave the house without makeup on. I thought these things. I really, truly did.

The most powerful thing I ever did was work to get over this spell, to get over this idea that I needed to look a certain way, or that I should work out to "look good" in a bikini. HA. Dropping that last particular idea made working out SO MUCH MORE MEANINGFUL and GRATIFYING (see previous blog posts).

It didn’t happen overnight, of course, it actually took years... and only recently have I really been able to silence that inner critic voice inside me… and let’s be real, it still pops up here and there... of course it does. 

But damn, the freedom I have being confident in the person I am, rather than focusing on the person I look like? Incredible.

And, the freedom I have in being confident in the person I look like, no matter how different it may be from our cultural standards? Well...Just picture me twirling around on a mountain somewhere, Sound of Music-style singing "THE HILLS ARE ALIVEEEEEE"... THAT'S how good it feels ;) .... and add in a middle finger to Hollywood among my twirls.

I see beauty in intellect, kindness, and passion.

So this is me saying to any of you who have felt like you need to diet and exercise in order to “look good” on the beach, or anywhere for that matter: (excuse my french, but) fuck that, you are beautiful right now, right as you are AND, you are so much more than your body.

So this is me saying to any of you who have felt like you need to dye your hair and get a tan to be sexy: you’re sexy just how you are, with or without the hair and the tan - AND I’ll bet a lot of money that your mind is your sexiest asset of all.

Namaste, ya beautiful people. I see you.